soc.couples.wedding FAQ

Archive-name: lifestage/wedding-faq/part1
Posting-Frequency: every 2 weeks
Last-modified: May 15, 2004
Version: 2.6

Written by Sonja Kueppers. Please submit any feedback by clicking on the Comments link at the bottom of this page. Thank you!

Topics Covered:

0) About this FAQ

0.1) Where can I find this FAQ?

0.2) What is the basis of the opinions in this FAQ?

0.3) Recent Changes

0.4) About the soc.couples.wedding WWW page

1) soc.couples.wedding

1.1) What is soc.couples.wedding?

1.2) Why is there a soc.couples.wedding?

1.3) Is commercial advertising acceptable in soc.couples.wedding?

1.4) What are these abbreviations I keep seeing?

2) Recommended Reading

2.1) For those who want to save money:

2.2) For those interested in writing their own vows/ceremony:

2.3) Cultures and Traditions

2.4) Etiquette

2.5) More on books by Denise & Alan Fields

3) Engagement

3.1) Does a woman's ring have to be a diamond? Does it have to be expensive?

3.2) Should the man pick out the ring by himself, or together with his prospective fiancée?

3.3) What about engagement rings for men?

3.4) Is it necessary to have a ring in order to propose?

3.5) Is a ring necessary at all?

4) Attendants

4.1) When should I choose my attendants?

4.2) Do my attendants have to be of my own gender?

4.3) Do I have to choose one attendant to be my honor attendant?

4.4) How many attendants do I need?

4.5) Is it necessary to have equal numbers of groomsmen and bridesmaids?

4.6) What roles can people who are not attendants play?

5) Wedding Attire

5.1) What are my options for an inexpensive wedding dress?

5.2) All of the dresses this season are way too revealing. Where can I find more modest styles?

5.3) How should the groom and groomsmen be properly dressed at various times of day?

5.4) Should the groom wear something different from the groomsmen?

5.5) Do the bridesmaids all have to wear the same dress?

6) Wedding Rings

6.1) Do I have to wear a wedding ring?

6.2) Do wedding bands need to be matching?

6.3) Does a wedding band need to be plain?

6.4) What metals can the ring be made out of?

6.5) If you have both an engagement and a wedding ring, which goes on the outside?

6.6) What do I do if the wedding ring I like doesn't work with my engagement ring?

7) People Issues

7.1) My mother is driving me crazy. She wants to control every aspect of the wedding.

7.2) Who should walk me down the aisle, my natural father or my stepfather?

7.3) My parents had a messy divorce, and they both say they won't attend the wedding if the other comes. How can I resolve this?

8) Invitations

8.1) What is the most proper way to have my invitations done?

8.2) Is it OK to send invitations to someone "and Guest"?

8.3) If I've invited guests and not invited their children, what do I do when they send a response saying their children are coming with them?

8.4) I have been invited to a wedding without my fiancé. Can I get my fiancé invited, or do I have to go alone?

8.5) What percentage of the people I invite can be expected to come?

8.7) Can I use my laser printer to address my invitations?

9) Photography and Video

9.1) Do I have to hire a professional photographer?

9.2) Should I have disposable cameras on the tables?

9.3) Should I have a wedding video made?

9.4) Should I hire a professional videographer?

10) Service Professionals

10.1) Do service professionals need to be fed?

11) Showers

11.1) Who can host a shower?

11.2) If the people at work give me a shower, do I have to invite them to the wedding?

11.3) Is it OK to include the bride's registry information with the shower invitation?

11.4) What are some possible shower themes?

11.5) Can I have a co-ed shower?

12) The Rehearsal Dinner

12.1) What kind of rehearsal dinner is acceptable?

12.2) Who is invited to the rehearsal dinner?

12.3) Who hosts the rehearsal dinner?

13) Gifts (advice for the bride and groom)

13.1) Should I register for gifts?

13.2) What should I register for?

13.3) How will people find out about my registry?

13.4) What do I do with gifts received before the wedding?

14) Gift-Giving

14.1) Am I required to give the bride and groom a wedding present?

14.2) Am I required to give a gift at a shower?

14.3) Am I required to choose a gift from the couple's registry?

14.4) When should I give the couple my wedding gift?

15) Officiants

15.1) Who can perform a wedding?

15.2) Universal Life Church